I yiman n teɛcirt-inu, i yemmuten deg unhezzi n tmurt n 2004.
Ssneɣ ila tudukkla-nneɣ temɣar. Maca ḥuma ad ay-dd-tlaɣa gi ttilifun ar setta n ṣṣbeḥ, ur xes nekkis. Mri ur teksi deg imeṭṭawen ataf nniɣ-as ijj n tnayen n wawalen.
—Temmut, mmuten, bezzaf idsen.
Ur fhimeɣ zeg wawal-ines ɣir tamettant. Nniɣ-as ur ittili ɣir d tamcumt-nni n lqaɛida tegga ɣezzu ɛawed gi ci n umkan. Ad aneɣ-sqebbḍen irumiyyen ar fruntira n Mlilt ad dd-dewlen.
—Wi immuten a Maria? Mani?
Ttrajiɣ ad ayi-dd-tini Barsiluna, Fransa, Amirikan. Zi 2001 taɛeddist-nneɣ tqess. Nejna x uqic ittenxelxal.
—Gi Arrif nniɣ-am. Tmasint, Imzuren, Lḥusima.
Ifadden-inu amexmi ten-tessexwid s bumba. Ɛad ur fhimeɣ maca ukiɣ s tmessi tettali-ay-dd zeg iḍaren. Tmasint, Imzuren, Lḥusima? Min yuqɛen? Kkren uka suggen-dd x-sen ɛawed? Ur ẓriɣ walu deg ussan i yeɛdan!
—Zzilzal nniɣ-am zzilzal d ameqqran—. Maria Tenna-dd zzilzal s tmaziɣt, ci nneɣni s tkatalant. —Temmut tmeddukelt Fatima. Mmuten ussa cḥal d iwdan.
Ass-nni, ur ḥdijeɣ ad ssnekkreɣ iḥermucen s iwa kker, deɣya, iɛda lḥal, tesḍuqquẓem-ay, ad dd-awiɣ aman… Tɣuyyit-inu texdem nnit ccɣel. Ufin-ay s ttilifun ɛad deg ufus, tarjajjayt teksi-ay, aqemmum ignu. Gi taddart n yemma gi Biyya, ḥedd ur dd-itterri x ttilifun. Min dasen-ɣa-iniɣ? Tamurt n yemmatkum tenhezz? Mmuten iwdan bezzaf. Ur nessin min ɛnan maca taɛcirt-inu yyih. I mamma? Walu, ur dayi dd-iffiɣ wawal.
X ubrid ar temzyida, usin-ay-dd iwdan d iɛeffanen, zehmen, tfuyt i dd-ittsajjan d taṣehyunt. Mukas iwdan-inu mmuten netnin ur nhewlen, mukas iwdan-inu tssulles x-sen, tfuyt tegra-dd am lebda. Wi day-dd-iwwin ar tmurt am ta? Hola-inem arnu-tt ar zzman-inem. Ixessa sseqsa-ay min day-yuɣen. Tiṭawin-inu deqlent. Abrid mmalen-ay-t iḥermucen. Igellinen ur issinen maɣar yemmatsen ur telli d nettat.
Isantimen ur ttidfen gi texbuct n ttilfun, astiqa msefhamen xi ad ay-sbuhlin. Iceqqufen-a n zzenqet dewlen ur neffɛen, ɛlayen ur iqqim ḥedd issexdam-iten ɣir igellinen n imetlaɛ. Jerrbeɣ-ten ijjen ijjen ula mala dewleɣ ar taddart. Ṭṭumɛeɣ gi lbaraka-nsen, ssaɛa walu. Aseɣdi d wenni, tiggʷdi tettraḥ trenni. Wciɣ ixef i usqerqeb x tewwura. Mala ad ten-slaqiɣ ad ay-wadmen mla slaqan-ay wadmeɣ-asen. Lmuhim ad nesmun amnus.
Ziɣenta Sbanya tekmel terri-dd lexbar kkes nec. Wi ur issruɣan amiẓar x tuffut, tusa-as-dd. Nemdurreɛ nec d suyetma amdurreɛ n tiggʷdi, amdurreɛ n uxiyyeq. Muneɣ akid-sent x temṭarbat zdat i ttilifizyun. Imeṭṭawen ttemselqan-anɣ gi tqesmirt, awal isax. Tiwlafin deg umiẓar ssawalent nnit. Tfenna denya deg Arrif, d aya i day-dd-yusin ar lbal. Tfenna ddenya necnin aqa-neɣ da.
—Atiɣ terwel.
—Atiɣ Biyya ur tt-iḥkim ci. Teẓrint twala-nni iwta ijhed ur zg-s iwwi walu.
—Cayellah ay idurar n Sidi Ɛabid
Atiɣ, atiɣ. Maca twala nni tudrin ur miyylent ar wami ẓurent tamurt, ur mmewḍint x tnayen, ur surent ag ucal. Taɛcirt-inu temmut.
Asektay ur day-iciwer waxxa maci d akud-ines. Iksi-ay ar wass-nneɣ ameggaru merra zdat ma ad nnejliɣ. Ila nettegg aseggʷas amaynu. Newwi arrays nec d nettat, nuca-as lmeftaḥ i tqedduḥt n yezlan ar wami fsin yexsan. Tmijja-ines teqqim-ay tercem deg wul am iḍdudan n lḥenni x wallun. Ila negga xmi ɣa nemẓar ad dd-nerr arrays deg uzqaq n taddart i x-as dd-iwḍan.
Atilifus jer n iḍuḍan n ultma yusus s ulaɣi. Lexbar ibedd, antirnit ila ɛad iggʷj aneɣ. Neẓẓel x tirjin, kul ijjten mani, nqella s uraji. Ar jjuj, teksi yemma. Tdewl-dd ar taddart ad teẓẓal.
– Mana tẓallit-a a yemma ḥennu, rwel s uzellif-inem. Rebbi d asemmaḥ
– Iwa ya yessi mri ur telli d tẓallit ataf ur tufint lexbar-inu. Ineqq nnhar a yessi, ineqq nnhar.
Neswa lqehwa ḥafi ar tlata n uzil. Tiqqext-ines tehwa gi tmijja, teggur tkerreḍ-itt. Nesraḥ cwayt n udewwex. Amexmi newwi awal, tarwa-nneɣ nejja-ten s kulci deg useccu n temzyida. Ifadden i ɣa ibedden gi kuzina dḥan d acḍaḍ. Delwent-idd tewlafin ag udwal n ineɣmisen n uzil. Delwent-idd am tsegnaf, am wuzzal imrer, am ticraḍ s kutciya. Ibalkunen delwen d tidukanin, iqqim wuzzal n lebni d imeccawn ikkes afrag x lmunkar, lṣwar suren x ifudar. Zi tddart-a ittsajja-dd ubayaṣ, zi tin tawwurt d tazegzawt. Iwdan ttekksen-dd iwdan. Settin n ssbeḥ, dewlen d imiyyaten. Tudrin i yeqqimen beddent jer n wabuj n ikerkuren dewlent ssaggwadent. Lmexzen ikka x-as yiḍeṣ.
I necnin, min da nttegg? Mix neṭṭef aɣesmir nettraja ineɣmisen?
Ila teɛda ssimanet. Iwta wenẓar wass-nni yugi ad yini ikfa. Aqiḍun n lwalidin n teɛcirt-inu issadaf. Iccat x tuffet, i qqarn s tkatalant. Abiṭus am lḥenni x iḍaren n suyt Biyya, i yulin ar lkambu ad ɛezzant. Iwdan ɛad lemmden ad sseɣlin tiyti ag imetmi. Imanen i yewwḍen ajenna ur tteksen i leḥsab.
Nejment txeswin, nejmen ikwadruten, ideqwaḥ n ideqqi ffexsen ur rriẓen, taɛcirt-inu ur tenjim. Yemma-s d baba-s am iyujilen sfirninen ur ssiwilen. Bezzaf ila tt-irezzun i lemlak nettat teqqar llemliḥ ur dd-yusi ci zi ṭṭarf ugiɣ-asen. Gi tidet, tugi ad tejj lwalidin-ines i yennumeɣren weḥḥed-sen. Mli tufa ataf tugur ar lxarij ad tɣar niɣ ad texedem, maca ur das-yuci wul.
Neqqim ar tmurt a nsu atay zi neɣra lquran. Masin d Iman ḍefren tiyaẓiḍin, “mama, ur mmutent ci”. Qqaɛ d aman. D aman zeg ujenna, d aman deg ucal, d aman gi tiṭawin. Ataf newwi-dd izli x watay, maca taɛcirt-inu temmut ay a ssus n yexsan, am wi iksin aberrad ijja lkisan xwan.
Necnin ad nedwel ar Uzzarg n imeɣrusen (saḥat ccuhada), iqiḍan-ines meɣren jehden, ttrajant-aneɣ tudrin ɛad beddent. I ayt d suyt tudrin n ucal?.
– Da i ɣa qqimeɣ a yessi, ar ɣa muneɣ ag ucal, ad ḍefreɣ Fatima-inu.
Samira, Warda d Nadia, tiḥermucin d timeẓyanin, qeblent ad ṣewwrent. Rrant s uɛrur i ijjt n taddart tleqqem s tḥenya, sfirnent i kamira. Talewzit, ci n wass ad teslulli.